Expensive Ring

An older man walked into a jewellery store one Friday evening with a beautiful young girl at his side. He told the jeweller he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweller looked through his stock and brought out a ring and showed it to him.
The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special." At that statement, the jeweller went to his special stock and brought another ring over.
"Here's a stunning ring at only $50,000," the jeweller said.
The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it."
The jeweller asked how payment would be made and the old man stated by cheque.
"I know you need to make sure the cheque is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank on Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said.
Monday morning, a very peed-off jeweller phoned the old man, "There's no money in that account."
"I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?"

Go fishing!

A guy from Nebraska moves to California and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.
The manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?"
The guy says, "Yeah, I was a salesman back home in Nebraska."
Well, the boss liked the guy so he gave him the job. "You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did" His first day on the job was rough but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down.

"How many sales did you make today?"
The guy says, "One."

The boss says, "Just one? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales a day. You're going to have to improve considerably or look for another job. How much was the sale for?"
The kid says, "$112,237.64."
The boss says, "$112,237.64?! What the hell did you sell?"

Kid says, "First I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fish hook. Then I sold him a larger fish hook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down at the lake, so I told him he was gonna need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a new bass boat. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that new Ford pickup. I asked him how long he was going to be out at the lake and after he said 5 or 6 days I took him down to the RV department and sold him a slide-in camper for the truck."

The boss said, "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat, fishing gear, a truck and a camper?"

The Kid says, "No, he came in here to buy a box of tampons for his wife and I said, 'Well, your weekend's shot now..., you might as well go fishing'"